(jet noises)

Finally I get on the plane

Then they make that announcement
"you can't use your cell phone."

Now, far be it from me to trifle
with the FAA

But, then I realize I couldn't
make a call if I wanted to

because I left my smart phone
plugged in and recharging

at my house.

Next time I am going to duct tape
two alarm clocks to my head

rigged in series -- forming a
sort of Cray super alarm clock

Heh Heh

That's a good engineering joke!

How can I help you?

Ahhh, Anyway. My entire life is
in that phone

My appointments, my contacts, My
phone numbers.

Well, obviously my phone
numbers.

Do you have your smart card?

Yes.

Maybe we can get your life back.

Can you believe I left my phone
at home?

It's a real shocker.

Ah! Now.

(beep... beep... beep...)

(jazzy music)

Oh no!

I'm late.

Owww!

Hey!

(Whoop whoop)

Man talking to cage: You OK?

Sorry

(Crash)

(Crash)

Aaargh!

Sorry dude.

(in agony) Sorry dude?

OoooH!

Aarrgh

(beep)

Call Dr. Andre.

Now!

(phone rings)

Dr. Andre's office

Yes! Hi. This is Steve Masters.

I need help.

Just relax Mr. Masters.

Would you mind if I verify your
identity?

Sure.

(beep... beep... beep...)

What happened this time Mr.
Masters?

Bike messenger. Don't ask.

I see this isn't your first
encounter with a bike messenger.

Oh I see, you're in San
Francisco.

Now do you have a pain or
swelling?

(shouting) Both!

And I'm a tad bit stressy.
Sorry.

I can hear that.

Do you need to go to the
emergency room?

No. Please.

Is there a clinic near by? That
accepts my insurance?

Let me see if I can schedule
something.

Good! Scheduling is good.

Alright, Mr. Masters. You've got
two choices:

One, your managed care with 100%
coverage has a clinic

30 minutes from you.

Eeeech

Or, your wife's Safety First
plan has a clinic

two blocks away and has an
opening in 15 minutes.

But, you're only covered for up
to 80%.

Good. 80%. Good.

Now do you want to pay the
remaining 20% out of your

prepaid medical? You have $2,000
left.

Yeah. Great. Sure.

Can you approve the doctor Waloo
accessing your medical records?

It will speed things up.

Yeah. Sure.

(beep... beep.. sigh)

Can you send a car service? Like
you did with my head?

Honey, it's on the way.

Ooooh

Nasty sprain, Steve.

Yeah. Ooooh.

Bike messenger again?

yeah

This is highly improbable.

Ah. You took the words right out
of my mouth Dr. Wayloo.

Waloo.

Waloo? Sorry.

You have to stay on your toes in
this city.

I'm gonna prescribe you
something for the pain.

Good.

Pharmacy next door OK?

Great.

(beep... beep...)

You're allergic to codeine, so
I'm gonna prescribe Meperidine.

Alright.

You know, I think I'm gonna give
you Morphine instead.

Morphine? Really? Wow!

Should be ready in about 15
minutes.

Watch out for bike messengers.

Ah Ha. AH Ha Ha Ha! Good one Dr.
Wayloo. Waloo... Wayloo...

I agree with Dr. Waloo. It
doesn't look like a break.

So you should be fine.

Oh that's good news. Oh sure.
Thank you Doctor.

Oh, and Steve, be careful out
there.

I'm gonna be a lot more careful.
I can tell you that!

(wham)

Oh Steve...